Here are some simple steps to take if you hear yourself saying “I don’t know what to do”
There is a famous poem written by Robert Frost in 1920 (Google – The Road Not Taken) In this poem the author makes a comparison of “Life” to a road through the Woods. He says that some roads are smooth and others are bumpy or have obstacles. This is very true of life and in the poem Frost encourages you to take risks and explore the unknown. I agree with this wholeheartedly because it’s so much fun.
However no matter which road you take there will be times when the following happens;
- You get stuck
- You reach a seemingly insurmountable obstacle
- You meet a problem outside your realm of experience
- You are confused by a situation and it causes you to stop
- You experience fear and you can move ahead
- You are so surprised by a situation you don’t know what to do
When you don’t know what to do, it’s very easy to end up in a rut. This creates a negative feedback loop and you end up no doing anything. Your thoughts run along this type of thinking.
You ask your self – “Now what do I do?” You answer – “I don’t know?”
This happens again and again – over and over.
There are simple solutions…
Solutions to “I don’t Know what to do?”
1. Re-frame the questions you ask yourself in regard to your situation
Sometimes you ask the same question of yourself – over and over again. “Why did he do that?” Of course its likely if you didn’t know the answer 10 minutes ago you won’t know the answer now. Ask something different – “What made him do what he did?” Sometimes this gives you the ability to get an answer just because the question is different.
2. It’s OK not to know the answer
Many people get stuck straight away because they “beat themselves up” for not having an immediate answer or for not foreseeing each and every problem they encounter. Remember nobody can know everything, and nobody can foresee everything, so be kind to yourself.
3. Its OK to pause but don’t stop
Take the time to reflect on the situation. Discover what the real problem is and what possible solutions might resolve it. Don’t spend so much time thinking that you lose momentum. Action usually leads to solutions. When you stop its very hard to get going again.
It’s a little Life Coaching” trick. When I hear someone say, “I don’t know what to do” I ask them – “What would you do if you did know what to do?”
It seems like a silly question, but most of the time they can get an answer this way. Sometimes you are so focused on the problem, you lose sight of the fact that you actually do know the answer. This type of question makes you focus on the solution instead of the problem.
5. Do Anything – Create Movement
Doing something – anything, changes your perspective. Even when you don’t know what to do – something is better than nothing. So toss a coin, go for a long lunch or go for a swim at the beach.
If you make a mistake and do the wrong thing – you will soon find out and you can change course then.The flip side of this is that what you did may be correct and solved your problem or situation.
6. Consult a Higher Power
I hope you know that you have access to a higher power. Your “Intuition” “higher self” “God” “Spirit Guides” whatever you believe in, its all there to help you. I call on intuition often and have spent a lot of effort to get it working well.
7. Get Help
Sometimes this is very difficult because you need to admit that you don’t have all the answers yourself. It makes you feel vulnerable because you are seeking guidance from someone else. Remember – one person can never have all the answers – but someone will be able to help you. Try family, friends, co-workers and at least think about some of their idea’s. Contact me and try some help I haven’t met anyone yet that I couldn’t help.
So if you are stuck or in a rut try the idea’s in this article and remember no matter how difficult it gets there is always a way forward and there is always a solution and it might be a lot closer and easier than you think.
Authors Details: I Don’t Know What To Do – Aymen Fares