Do You Need To Talk?

A valid question to ask yourself is, do you need to talk? You often talk when there is no reason to talk. You are just thinking aloud. Your thoughts put so much pressure on the real YOU that by talking you release this pressure. You sound out your thoughts with other people. You can then see or validate what you are thinking through the reaction of others.

Have you ever asked yourself – why do people talk? Do you actually need to talk in certain circumstances?

Some people talk more than others, some people talk too much and others don’t talk at all – for a variety of reasons. The subject of talking and how it relates to your inner world is fascinating.

do you need to talk

Talking

Here is a verse from a well know poet that answers the question,  “why do people talk”? beautifully. 

You talk when you cease to be at peace with your thoughts. 

And when you can no longer dwell in the solitude of your heart you live in your lips, and sound is a diversion and a pastime. 

And in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered. 

For thought is a bird of space, that in a cage of words many indeed unfold its wings but cannot fly. 

There are those among you who seek the talkative through fear of being alone. 

The silence of aloneness reveals to their eyes their naked selves and they would escape. 

And there are those who talk, and without knowledge or forethought reveal a truth which they themselves do not understand. 

Kahlil Gibran 

Thinking Aloud

You often talk when there is no reason to talk. You are just thinking aloud. Your thoughts put so much pressure on the real YOU that by talking you release this pressure. You sound your thoughts onto other people. You can then see or validate what you are thinking by the reaction of others. 

Have you ever asked yourself why you actually talk? Besides the obvious – communication to pave your way through life, you most likely talk too much. Now I know that is a bold statement and could even be considered rude, so read on and learn a little more about yourself. 

Thinking

Talking is expressing your thoughts. 

When you think you are really responding to the stimulus of the physical world. You thoughts are created from what is around you. Those thoughts are coloured and biased depending on what YOUR past has shown you. Remember your experience of the past is your truth but not THE truth. 

The thoughts that you do have, can be confusing. They are not always clear because you interpret everything through a cloudy filter. In other words what you think is biased, you cannot see everything and because of the way you respond to what is around you, those same thoughts create inner conflict. 

In turn this creates more thoughts. Sometimes you have too many thoughts to cope with and they turn into emotions. 

In order to resolve this conflict you express what you are thinking. 

So you talk! 

Of course the list of ways in which you could express yourself is endless. However almost everyone talks. 

Here are two ways you use talking to express what you think.

When you offer your opinion it can be a sign you are not at peace with your thoughts. The stronger the urge the more conflict you have. Of course your opinion can subtly enter almost every conversation you have. The extreme of this is when you argue and force your opinion onto the person you are talking too. You are attempting to change the other person who is in fact your reflection! When your reflection changes, you think that your line of thinking is correct because it is reflected in those people around you.

Religion

An example of this would be religion. Religion works on faith. In order to have faith you are required to believe without proof. This can be difficult. When others around you do not believe in any religion or your religion – faith can be even harder to hold. 

When you convince your “neighbor” that your religion is right – you are subconsciously working on your reflection. When your reflection (the people around you) also believe in your faith – it is convincing for you and as such, easier to adopt or remain with the faith. 

This is why you are more comfortable around others who are like you.

You are thinking something and you wish to convey the thought but you can’t bring yourself to clearly express it. You talk and make conversation yet you are not saying what you want. You use the conversation to maneuver into position. This is done unconsciously.

Lets say you want to ask someone out on a date. You can’t bring yourself to do this because you fear rejection. So you talk. You say stuff that makes what we call ‘small talk’. This has hidden intention. The intent of the small talk is to get to a hint that will allow your original thought expression out via talk, with out any chance of rejection. In other words you are waiting for a cue that suggests ‘YES if you ask me out I will say YES!’ 

Listen

Either way, when you are at peace you listen much more than you speak. The cliché that says you have two ears and one mouth suggests that you listen twice as much as you talk. This is a good rule of thumb. As you progress in your personal development you will find that the desire to talk diminishes rapidly. 

I am not suggesting that you do not talk! I am alerting you to the fact that; 

  1. It is not a necessity
  2. Most talk is excess.

There is much to be learned in silence. Like what is going on in your head? From listening to yourself great progress in the field of your own personal development can be made. 

Let me know what you think of this concept. Have you ever tried to converse with someone that spoke too much? Comment below or join me and comment on Facebook

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