Lets learn how envy works.
Mind is everything; we become what we think.
Mind is everything, means that your whole world comes from your mind. If there is something you don’t like or something that needs fixing then the solution comes from your mind. Whatever you think, you become. Thinking creates your world. Learn how to use your mind for it’s intended purpose. Its intended purpose is to create your world. Can’t be bothered??? Too bad, you are already doing it. You have been doing it from birth. You can’t get out of it. It is happening with every thought you have and you have about two thoughts per second. That’s why its important to understand the process. You can learn more about the way you work reading these newsletters or you can invest in the ‘Key To Life Manual’ as detailed below.
Today we are going to discuss envy and how you feel when you look at others.
I notice that when I write about action and doing things like making a change in your life, that I receive a larger than usual number of ‘unsubscribe from this newsletter’ requests. It’s interesting because action and doing, is very confrontational.
When something is confrontational, its ‘in your face’ and it makes you feel bad.
NO! Wait a moment.
You make you feel bad.
Here is an example of envy.
A friend of yours buys a large house. He does so well before you or any of his friends, family and acquaintances can afford to do the same. All of a sudden you decide that he has ‘changed’ and you lose contact with him. In fact he loses many of his friends.
Your mind plays a trick on you. It says you have to compete because you are in the same circle as he is. It says that, because you don’t have a house like his, you are not as good. Your mind decides for you, without you even realising what has occurred. There is a comparison to be made and once there is a comparison, you are inadvertently competing.
Competition causes stress. Stress is not necessarily bad, especially in moderation. Your mind in order to cope with the tension of competition looks for the easiest way out.
If there was a flicker of thought along the lines of –
‘I will never be able to afford such a house’
then the tension release for your mind, will NOT be to go and get a house just like his. It will be to disassociate from your friend. In other words, not see him anymore. You can then tell yourself that everything is alright and acceptable. No one in your circle is doing better than you.
You justify ditching your friend by saying that he has changed.
He has changed!
But that’s not why you don’t see him anymore. Not seeing him because he has changed, would imply that he has changed for the worse. This is rarely the case except in the movies where the wealthy guy is always the arrogant bad guy.
The fact is that he has changed, full stop. He has a bigger house and there are other differences, otherwise he wouldn’t be in this new situation.
The reason you don’t get along as you did before is because you haven’t changed!
Let me put that another way. It doesn’t matter whether you accept or agree but the world is constantly changing. When you do nothing ie: ‘don’t change’ you are really changing!
This happens because in the world that you live in, change is relative. Relative to the changing world you are now and every moment from now on, different.
Bad luck, you can’t stand still. If you think you can, you are mistaken.
Lets get back to your friend and envy. You feel bad so it is easier to not see what your friend has.
Even though this situation happens with people everyday it is extreme to not see your friend anymore. You might just use words (remember words come from thoughts and they build your world) to soothe your soul.
“oh it’s ok, he inherited the money”
You attribute the responsibility to something other than him. It allows you to look better by default. It prevents him from looking too good.
This example may not be to your liking. You might be thinking
‘who cares about big houses?’
Lets look further at envy and apply this to relationships. You really want a relationship and haven’t got one. You see your friends ‘the happy couple’ and the same thing occurs.
This is all an illusion. It is caused because you are not aware of how your mind, the greatest tool in the known universe, works. You are focusing on the wrong things because you are not aware of what your thoughts are doing.
Focus on what you want and don’t put limitations on yourself. You can have whatever you want in life. Your mind was designed to allow this to happen. You need to learn to use it to get what you want.
By not looking anymore, that is by surrounding yourself with ‘small house’ people or with single people you are preventing the vision from staying in your mind.
If you want a big house or a great relationship you need to keep these things in your mind. One way of doing this is to surround yourself with the people who already have what you want. It helps you to keep your vision.
It’s easy to master this. The ‘key To Life’ Manual shows you how to get exactly what you want.
Aymen Fares is an International Life Coach with clients all over the world. He is based in Melbourne Australia.
find out about his ‘Key To Life’ Manual