| Simple
Techniques to Cure Premature Ejaculation
Is
this an all too familiar scenario? Hot and heavy loving with
hungry kisses and tender caresses that promise orgasmic bliss
for both you and your eager partner when all of a sudden you're
one thrust past the edge, the dam bursts and it's over. You're
finished, "spent" and ready for sleep. She's still
waiting for more, perhaps wistfully contemplating a purchase
of that acrylic vibrating dildo her friend has been raving
about.
Well,
you're not alone in this too-quick-for-her-climax intercourse.
The "average" man makes about 50 thrusts before
he ejaculates. For most women it takes approximately 10 minutes
of active intercourse to reach orgasm. Even the most optimistic
lover can see these numbers just don't add up! But don't roll
over and nod off yet, there are some simple things you can
do to bring your partner and you much closer together.
These
male/female discrepancies in timing are part physiological
and part habit. Physically men's and women's arousal rates
vary widely, but for the most part women become fully turned
on much more slowly than men. So a great way to make sure
you're both happy with your love life is to include lots of
foreplay. Help her reach orgasm with your fingers, tongue,
lips before you even start to have intercourse.
Secondly,
most men's experience with sex starts out as rather furtive
masturbation, a quick release in the bathroom or under the
bedcovers before someone can see what's going on. Then onto
early sexual experiences with a girlfriend in back seats of
cars or in a basement rec room, again in a hurry, before she
changes her mind or her parents come along to change it for
her.
Now
when you have the time and space for long lovemaking good
old John Thomas is still back in the "I've gotta come
now" days, and he's not going to slow down just because
you tell him to. That's like asking a guy who's trained as
a sprint champ to bring home a gold in the 5000 meter instead.
He may well be able to make the shift but he's going to need
coaching. You can train him with your mind, your muscles and
your breath or a combination of all three. It's not entirely
up to you either, your loving partner can assist, after all
it's for her benefit as well!
The
first step to cure premature ejaculation is to become aware
of your own levels of arousal. Experiment, take your time
and give yourself a very real self-loving exploration, not
just a quick masturbatory release. Notice how your penis moves
through distinct changes before orgasm and ejaculation, he's
not just soft and then hard and spewing. There are four defined
stages of erection: lengthening and filling; swelling; full
erection; rigid erection. The fourth stage, rigid erection,
characterized by a penis that's very stiff (a boner) and very
hot, signifies ejaculation is close at hand. Through attentive
self-arousal and the playful hands of your sweetheart you
can learn how to stay for longer periods of time in the exciting,
but less explosive, third stage of firm erection. When you
feel yourself moving into the hard, hot level stop stimulation,
relax and pay attention to your breathing. Breathe slowly
and deeply.
The
Power of Breath
Conscious
breathing is a key for extended lovemaking. Rapid breathing
excites and arouses you. Slow, controlled breathing, way down
into your belly, calms you and helps delay ejaculation. Focusing
on your breath takes your attention away from your genitals.
Synchronizing your breathing rhythm with your partner's strengthens
your connection with each other.
Adding
sound to your breathing can also help you ride the edge of
pleasure. As you exhale send out a deep lion roar. Feel the
sound come from your scrotum, up through your belly and lungs
and out your mouth as a powerful release of the orgasmic tension
building inside you.
You
can use some of the following "muscle techniques"
to postpone ejaculation as well.
PC
(pubococcygeous) Muscle Contraction
This
is simply squeezing your pelvic floor muscles, around the
scrotum, penis and anus as you feel ejaculation approaching.
An easy way to practice this is to interrupt your urine stream
when you are going to the bathroom.
Perineum
Pressure
Pressing
on the perineum, a spot midway between your scrotum and your
anus, will help to stop ejaculation because this spot reaches
through to the prostate gland. It is the prostate that contracts
and expands during orgasm and then expels the ejaculation
fluid. Ask your partner to apply this loving pressure for
you.
Testes
Tug
When
a man nears orgasm his scrotum rises up closer to his body.
You can delay ejaculation by gently pulling your testes down
and away from your body. Your partner can also do this for
you.
Penis
Tip Squeeze
Squeezing
your penis just below the head or glans can help to stop oncoming
ejaculation. It necessitates withdrawing completely from your
partner during intercourse, but is an excellent way to begin
practice on your own with masturbation.
Passion
Pump
This
technique, which combines squeezing the PC muscles, rolling
your eyes upward, touching your tongue to the roof of your
mouth, and visualizing your sexual energy flowing up through
your body while you practice controlled deep breathing is
one of the most effective ways of delaying ejaculation. It's
a Taoist sexual kung fu technique that has the added benefit
of helping you circulate your sexual energy through your body
rather than having it remain hot and heavy in your genital
region.
Special
Tip
It
is easier to cure premature ejaculation by focusing on moving
your sex energy through your body rather than focusing on
not ejaculating. Stopping movement, relaxing a little and
breathing deeply and slowly will all aid with this practice.
The
Importance of the Prostate Gland
When
you practice delaying ejaculation it is very important to
massage the prostate gland, so that it doesn't become sore.
You can do this by pressing on the perineum. The prostate
can be felt as a bumpy walnut shape beneath your fingers.
Especially delightful is massaging in circular motions, first
clockwise and then counterclockwise, with a piece of folded
silk on the perineum spot.
Thrusting
Technique
A
superb thrusting technique that brings great pleasure to a
woman and helps a man to last is a combination of deep and
shallow thrusts. By shallow thrusts we mean your penis only
enters 11/2 to 2 inches inside your partner. These first couple
of inches are the most sensitive part of a woman's vagina.
Deep thrusts mean your penis enters as fully as you can.
In
this technique you combine a series of nine fairly quick shallow
thrusts with one slow deep one. The shallow thrusts stimulate
your partner's most sensitive vaginal tissues and at the same
time create a vacuum effect that makes her ache for the deep
thrust to come. And because most of your thrusts are shallow
ones, exciting only the first few inches of your penis, you're
able to rock on for much longer!
Mind
over Muscle
Practicing
squeezing your PC muscles will enable you to gradually become
so familiar with your genitals, that you will be able to discern
each separate muscle group and contract/relax them at will.
At first you will tighten your genitals and everything will
contract at once. Later you will be able to contract your
anal muscles without moving your penis or scrotum, or pull
up your scrotum while your anus and penis remain relaxed,
or bob your penis up and down while nothing else moves. Eventually
just a thought will relax everything, especially your smooth
genital muscles, sending your hot sexual energy shooting through
your body, not out the end of your penis, but instead into
your partner through eye contact, intercourse, or touching.
Smooth
muscles are internal muscles over which you normally have
no conscious control. You may not have been aware that you
have smooth muscles. They're muscles like your heart muscle,
the muscles that push your food through your digestive tract
and the muscles that push the sperm and semen out the end
of your penis. Becoming aware of your smooth muscles and eventually
gaining enough mastery to be able to consciously keep them
relaxed will enable blood to flow into the penis, maintaining
an erection almost indefinitely - certainly long enough to
satisfy the most demanding partner, through and through. Gaining
control over the smooth muscles in your genitals is the key
to maintaining your peak sexual arousal for long periods of
time -- even long enough to experience whole body orgasms,
rather than simply genital orgasms. In a whole body orgasm
your entire body becomes an exquisite erogenous zone, much
like your genitals always are. You can actually reach orgasm
when your lover is rubbing your chest, or sucking on your
toes and fingers, or nibbling your ears and throat.
The
magical key to opening the doorway into multiple whole body
orgasms is relaxation of your smooth muscles, no matter how
aroused, excited, or turned on you are.
Train
your mind to think of something other than ejaculation. Thinking
"I don't want to ejaculate" is still thinking about
ejaculation. You must have something else to focus your attention.
We don't recommend reciting sports stats or in any way diverting
your attention from lovemaking. It is essential that you be
fully present from moment to moment. But instead of thinking
about ejaculation, or worrying about ejaculating too quickly,
we suggest you think about pleasing your partner. Learn to
take pleasure for yourself in the pleasing of your partner.
Notice how she reacts when your tongue is exploring around
her clitoris, but also notice how her clitoris feels on your
tongue. Notice how she enjoys when you suck on her nipples,
but also notice how her breasts feel pressed against your
face. Notice how she moans when you gently run your fingers
up the inside of her thighs, but also notice how her skin
feels so soft and warm against your fingers.
With
your attention fully engaged in this way - on your partner,
your breath, your genital muscles -- you are going to last
a long time. As your lovemaking goes on, and on, and on...
perhaps for hours, the energy within you and between you and
your lover will accumulate to such an intense level that you
may spontaneously experience the opening of your higher "spiritual"
centres. With this opening comes an experience of ecstasy,
bliss, joy, and wonder. This is where mastery can cure premature
ejaculation and leave you and your partner satisfied .
| Authors
Details: Pala Copeland & Al Link Website |
Here
are more articles on how to cure Premature Ejaculation
(Use
Tantra To Cure Premature Ejaculation)
(Premature
Ejaculation Treatment)
Try also the Tantra Section & the Relationships Section of this Web Site |
