There
have been many books written about "The Art of Loving," but very
few written from the perspective of Spirit, the Soul, and the
Ascended Masters' perspective. Most books written on "The Art
of Loving" are written from the perspective of the personality,
rather than from the perspective of the Soul and Mighty I Am
Presence.
I
have been inwardly guided this day to write an article on "The
Art of Loving" from a Spiritual and/or Higher Consciousness perspective.
Love from the perspective of the personality, deals very much
with feelings and the importance of expressing one's feelings.
This is fine, however, this in truth is, only one quarter of
what love really is. Feelings are by their very nature very amorphous.
They are here one moment and then gone the next. Anyone who bases
their relationship just on how they feel at any given moment
is going to have a relationship that has enormous ups and downs,
and is very rocky to say the least. In truth, "The Art of Loving" is
so much more than this.
The
true "Art of Loving" deals not only with how one feels which
is connected with the subconscious mind, it also deals very much
with the conscious mind and Superconscious mind. The true "Art
of Loving" involves not just the feeling of love, romantic and
sexual feelings, but also what I would call a mental attitude
of love. This means first off a commitment to be unconditionally
loving at all times with your partner, even if you donšt feel
like it. You may feel angry, and feel like emotionally attacking
your partner however, in the true "Art of Loving" this is not
something you give into, for from a Spiritual perspective this
would be a total indulgence in your negative ego.
My
Beloved Readers, we begin to see now for the first time some
of the initial differences between personality level love, and
true Soul and Spiritual love. "The Art of Loving" from a Spiritual
perspective is always unconditionally loving and never conditionally
loving. It is never attacking or judgmental. It only shares loving
observations, Spiritual discernments and preferences. The Spiritual
Art of Loving always forgives even if your own negative ego doesnšt
feel like it. Spiritual love always communicates in a calm, rational,
unconditionally loving manner, and does not argue or engage in
ego battles. Spiritual love is tolerant, patient, and always
a love finder not a fault finder.
One
of the keys to "The Art of Loving" is having an attitude of love,
not just feelings of love. Over the long haul of a long term
relationship it is very unlikely that any relationship would
last without both partners developing "The Art of Loving" in
their mental bodies as well as their emotional bodies. People
who have developed "the Art of Loving" in their mental body understand
that to be right in a relationship, one must first be right with
self and right with GOD. If one is not right with self and right
with GOD you will also be off-kilter and disconnected from your
partner. This is because our thoughts create our reality.
In
truth, fifty to seventy-five percent of the problems that people
are having in their relationships stem from not being right with
self and right with GOD. They think it is the other person but
from the Soul and Spirit's perspective it is not. In truth, everything
your partner does is a Spiritual test to teach you to practice
unconditional love and transcendence of your own negative ego
thought system, feelings and emotions. Most people not having
been trained in how to master their own negative ego and emotional
body are letting some of this spill over into their relationship.
This is not a judgment, just a very important Spiritual insight.
When
I used to do a lot of relationship counseling, being a Spiritual
Psychologist and Marriage/Family/Child Counselor, I found that
seventy-five percent of the relationship problems cleared up
after I would do two or three sessions helping each individual
in the relationship get right with self and right with GOD. This
means helping each person get fully back into their 100% personal
power, unconditionally love and self-worth, golden bubble of
protection, attunement to their own Mighty I Am Presence, preference
instead of attachment attitudes, looking at everything as Spiritual
lessons and tests, transcending negative ego thought system and
practicing Christ/Buddha thought system.
The
individual counseling served as a complete polar axis shift of
their own consciousness, which made them see their relationship
in whole new light and understanding. It broke all the co-dependence
and seeking wholeness and love outside of self and established
this empowerment, love, and wholeness within self and relationship
to GOD first.
The
Superconscious mind is involved in "The Art of Loving" as the
name I am giving to represent the Soul, Higher Self and Mighty
I Am Presence within each person. When the Superconscious or
Spiritual level is integrated into the equation of "The Art of
Loving," besides what has already been mentioned, there is an
extremely high level of Christ/Buddha consciousness that is infused
into the process.
This
manifests as a tremendous desire within each person in the relationship,
to be of the highest Spiritual purity and integrity.
It
manifests as a desire to give rather than take or receive.
It
manifests in a Saintly quality that is always desiring to be
the first to forgive, apologize and admit mistakes.
It
manifests as a willingness to be devastatingly honest with self
in the highest Spiritual sense to not defend onešs own negative
ego.
It
manifests in an unbelievably high degree of individual self-mastery,
self-discipline and Spiritual vigilance to not allow negative
ego thoughts and feelings or emotions to take over one's consciousness
and to never take them out on their partner.
It
manifests as a desire to give pleasure to one's partner on all
levels as a priority, rather than just seeking one's own self-pleasure
and satisfaction.
It
manifests as an extreme desire to be positive and optimistic
in all aspects of self, life, and in the relationship.
It
manifests as a willingness to always walk the extra mile for
your partner even when psychologically and/or physically tired
or fatigued. It manifests as an ability to remain unconditionally
loving, positive and upbeat even when your partner is not.
It
manifests as a willingness to compromise and to sacrifice one's
own preferences to make your partner happy.
This
is done with total Spiritual love and sincerity not with the
attitude of being a martyr. The Superconscious mind or Spiritual
level also manifests as a desire to be selfless, rather than
selfish. It manifests as a spirit of unconditional love and goodness
that always gives their partner the benefit of the doubt.
It
manifests as a commitment to never hold on to negativity, and
if something is bothering them they either communicate it in
an unconditionally loving, uncritical, rational and nonself-righteous
manner, or they forgive and let go of this process within self.
They do not give in to moodiness and maintain their Christ/Buddha
consciousness and ideals even when physically tired. They practice
detachment, defenselessness, harmlessness, and humility, at all
times even when attacked or criticized. They look at every negative
interaction as another opportunity to practice greater Christ/Buddha
consciousness and unconditional love.
The
Superconscious and Spiritual mind infuses the desire for Unconditional
Love rather than needing to be right or needing to win. The Superconscious
and Spiritual mind have the individual do all these things even
if the other person is not always doing them. This is done for
the purpose of achieving God Realization within self and for
the purpose of setting a better example in their relationship
which most often inspires the other to do the same.
Lastly,
the Superconscious and Spiritual mind inspire the individual
to lovingly recognize the psychological and/or Spiritual weaknesses
in their partner, and to not only not hold this or use this against
them, but to instead make adjustments and compensations in one's
own consciousness to allow these character weaknesses to be developed
over time. This is not done from a "holier than thou" attitude,
for your partner is doing the same and/or will do the same for
any weaknesses, bad habits, or mistakes you shall make as well.
So
in the highest level of "The Art of Loving" from a Spiritual
perspective, the main "fight" two Masters of this practice will
have is who will give and serve the other more! My Beloved Readers, "The
Art of Loving" from a Spiritual and Higher Consciousness perspective
not only includes the feeling, thought, and Spiritual level also
described here as the Subconscious, Conscious, and Superconscious
level. It also includes the physical/Earthly level.
It
manifests this Superconscious and Spiritual love, giving, and
selflessness in the way one approachs sexuality.
It
manifests in one's generosity with dealings with money. It manifests
this Spiritual quality in being willing to take Earthly responsibility
for chores.
It
manifests as a willingness to take on the otheršs responsibilities
and chores during times of physical sickness, psychological exhaustion
and/or undue stress.
It
manifests in remembering birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays.
It manifests as buying flowers, sweet gifts, and leaving sweet
notes or messages for no special reason.
It
manifests as telling your partner you love them as often as possible,
and constantly giving them kisses, love and affection. It means
being willing to make large physical sacrifices at times regarding
such things as where one lives, jobs, and certain material expenditures,
to please your partner that you would not necessarily make on
your own. When mistakes are made, they are quickly forgiven by
both people in the relationship.
If
negative feelings and emotions do manifest, they are communicated
in an unconditionally loving manner, while still taking responsibility
for the fact that we each cause our own reality by how we think.
In this vein, no one is blamed for how the other feels, for victim
consciousness is not practiced even if negative feelings do arise
at times. If they do arise they are made part of the communication
process, for as Virginia Satir stated, "Communication is to a
relationship, what breathing is to living."
So
my Beloved Readers, in conclusion we can see very clearly that
the true "Art of Loving" is a four-fold process involving the
Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, and Physical/Earthly levels. It
is when "The Art of Loving" is practiced from this Integrated
Spiritual and Higher Consciousness perspective, that you will
have the greatest possible fulfillment and success within self
and within your romantic Spiritual relationship!
| Authors
Details:
Dr
Joshua David Stone
Dr
Stone has a PhD. in transpersonal psychology and is a licensed
marriage, family and child counselor in Los Angeles. The
Authors Web Site |
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